


All That We Seem

by alexcat



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Ficlet, M/M, Present Tense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 03:10:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16945842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexcat/pseuds/alexcat
Summary: Things cannot always be fixed.





	All That We Seem

**Author's Note:**

> For a Fiction Renegade Monday Prompt: Write a story in present tense.

You are not wrong, who deem  
That my days have been a dream;  
Yet if hope has flown away  
In a night, or in a day,  
In a vision, or in none,  
Is it therefore the less _gone_?  
All that we see or seem  
Is but a dream within a dream.  
~ Edgar Allan Poe 

*

I watch him sleep. I’ve watched him every night since he got back. Just like every other night, he falls asleep and then he wakes screaming. I turn the light on. He looks at me, and I can tell he doesn’t know who I am. He never knows when he wakes up like this. 

“Get away!” he screams at me. 

He is still beautiful, even if he doesn’t remember me. I sit on the edge of his bed. “It’s all right. You’re home. Go back to sleep,” I whisper in my most soothing voice. I smooth his dark hair back and talk to him until I finally hear his breathing even out. 

He is asleep. 

I gently lie beside him. I’m almost asleep when he screams again. We do it all again. 

I know that morning will come, but it never feels like it at this time of night. It feels like daylight is but an elusive dream. 

The sun does eventually rise and he wakes. He smiles at me and kisses my cheek. “I love you,” he whispers to me as his hand begins to wander, finding those places that make me come undone every single time. 

“Please,” I whisper as he peels my sweatpants off, his hand then his mouth touch my bare skin. 

He does all the things he knows I like. 

Afterward, I watch him sleep. He doesn’t wake this time. He isn’t as afraid in the daylight. He remembers me sometimes, too. He even calls my name once in a while. 

The doctor comes in. “You shouldn’t be here,” he scolds me, but his words have no bite. “He needs his rest.” 

“Does he?” I ask.

The doctor smiles sadly. “I don’t know what he needs. He is calmer with you here. We don’t have to drug him as much. Does he know you at all?”

I can’t tell him the whole truth. His body knows mine, every single inch of mine. His brain knows my name once or twice a day. 

I hope things will change, but it’s been four years now. Four years since we fixed the mess Thanos made and brought them all back. Most are like him, sort of living in a twilight nightmare that never ends. 

The doctor pats my shoulder and leaves the room. 

“It’s time for your breakfast. Shall I help you dress?” I look in his drawers for some clothing, choosing a pair of jeans and a soft grey t-shirt. I help him put them on and comb his hair, pulling it back into a pony tail. I pin the empty sleeve of his t-shirt closed. 

“Will you tell me a story before we go?” he asks. 

I sigh, knowing which one he wants. “What story do you want?” 

“Tell me about Captain America and his best friend, Bucky. I like that one.”

I begin to tell him the story. “A long, long time ago in Brooklyn…”


End file.
